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Tag Archive 'scientology'

Whether you’re in favor of interfaith marriage or opposed to interfaith marriage, the Washington Post has got both good and bad news for you. First, the good (or bad) news: interfaith marriages are occurring at higher rates than ever! The bad (or good) news: they’re also failing at higher rates than ever! The former shouldn’t [...]

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I apologize for not having posted in so long, but I’ve been working on a top secret project with NASA. You see, thanks to a combination of disingenuous Mayans, misunderstandings involving the Temples of Syrinx, the teachings of self-styled “gurus” like “the guy who killed all those people in a sweat lodge to unleash their [...]

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Happy Blasphemy Day! Of course, around these parts every day is Blasphemy Day, so today we’re actually focused on celebrating the anniversary of when a thetan was reborn as Jenna Elfman. Nonetheless, we like to think that we have some expertise in things blasphemous. In that spirit [ha!], here are some celebratory tips: participate in [...]

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Inconsiderate Use of Creation

What causes global warming? There’s a number of commonly-held theories: carbon dioxide third-world “kleptocrats” trying to usher in a “New International Economic Order” cow farts Marxism meat-eating Swiss prayers sunspots the earth’s increasingly-hot molten core nothing the Industrial Revolution government funding for studying global warming power-driven financiers and profit-driven corporations and their cartels backed by [...]

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If you’re at all interested in the world of finance, you may have encountered Catholic Mutual Funds (who claim they can beat the market by shorting the stocks of gay-friendly companies), Islamic Mutual Funds (who claim they can beat the market by shorting the stocks of media companies who publish pictures of Muhammad), and Jewish [...]

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When I saw the article title “Why does God allow evil to succeed?” I was hoping that the Kansas City Star was going for some sort of hard-hitting, Pulitzer-aspiring exposé involving several reporters and months of investigation, culminating in a 5-day multi-part series. (“Part 3: Evil in Our Community.”) Unfortunately, once I clicked through I [...]

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Looking to opt out of the forthcoming “cash for clunkers” healthcare legislation? How about a religious exemption? One of the central tenets of the health care legislation under construction on Capitol Hill is a mandate that every American be protected by some kind of medical insurance. There’s one exception to the mandate, though: people opposed [...]

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Which Hell is Michael Jackson In?

Jehovah’s Witness Hell Argument for: hit song “Blood on the Dance Floor” violates JeWit interpretation of Acts 15:28-29 Argument against: kicked out in 1987 for “suggestive dance, dress, and grooming” Muslim Hell Argument for: inclusion of Mohammed caricature on Off the Wall album liner Argument against: professed Shahadah at Toto keyboardist Steve Porcaro‘s house in [...]

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The Catholic Church is warning its parishioners that Confession is not the same thing as psychiatry. Now, there wouldn’t be confusion if there weren’t similarities. Both involve lots of Latin buzzwords. Both are very unpopular with Scientologists. Both require you to tell your secrets to some weirdo in a dark room. And both present the [...]

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freedom to mock

I had better get my book to market before the anti-blasphemy movement makes it to this country: Ever since 2006, when Muslims worldwide rioted over newspaper cartoons picturing the prophet Muhammad, Western countries, too, have been prosecuting more individuals for criticizing religion. The “Free World,” it appears, may be losing faith in free speech. We [...]

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